Those who did their training at the old Gravesend National Sea Training School will remember the old work-horses of the river the Thames Barges, almost every day one of these old sailer’s could be seen slowly tacking up or down the river. I remember being out rowing the whale-boat while one of the barges was slowly making her way down-stream, our instructor took us close to the barge to give us all a more detailed look, he pointed out the drop keel on the side of the vessel explaining how this aided stability when sailing and he raved on about the ability of the barge masters, they were true sailors those old skippers even though it was only up and down the river.
After all the years since those days I still have a picture of a barge under full sail in my memory’s, it was wonderful sight.

This is a link to a site dedicated to the old Thames Barge plus other ships and planes, there's an interesting piece about Glen Millers fateful flight to Paris.Click Here

Hi Tony ,
this is a forthcoming excerpt from my story, and I kid you not ,I wrote last night . When I saw your posting this morning ,I thought I'd whack it on here to keep yours company. It's about the same subject but just anecdotal.
I was at Gravesend as well as the Vindi,only did a fortnight ;that's where we trained for the Armistice Parade in London,
BrianD


Interlude
Whilst I was working on the Thames we used to weekend in Greenhithe, as the cook went home for the time we were there ,we had to find somewhere to eat. The Brown Bear was our choice, it was friendly, the ale was excellent and the food was English cooking at its best.
The Landlord and his wife were Jimmy and Effie Uglow, their son Alan was an Oxbridge graduate :I’ve forgotten which one he went to. They had a dog,a collie, and it was very friendly. They used to get plenty of visitors to the pub and they had a bar card upon which there was a photo of Jim and Effie with the dog sat between them. It bore the legend “Welcome to the Brown Bear ,the pub that is so friendly even the dog says hello” Jim ,or Effie would give newcomers to the pub a doggie chocolate drop and tell them to put it on the back of their hand. The dog would then come over to them and whine a sound that really sounded like “hello” It was wonderful to see the faces of the foreigners when the dog did its party piece.
Jimmy spent the bulk of his life as a barge captain working for F.T Everard and sons. In the early 30’s he became skipper of the Will Everard and sailed on her right through the Second World War and was one of the only Bargees to have been awarded the MBE. He was a Thames barge skipper up until his retirement which, I think , took place in the late 50’s . It was then he became the licensee of the Brown Bear.
Jim was a marvellous mine host, as well as keeping a fine cellar and kitchen ,he was a marvellous raconteur. I think he looked a lot like Billy Cotton ,the old band leader, and his wife Effie was very gracious; Alan ,the son cared not for his appearance but was very erudite and could always offer a good conversation. He had a mind like a steel trap and could knock off the Times crossword whilst serving at the bar.
Friday nights would see Jim taking his lady up to the West End, without fail he would come around to the customer side in his night out suit and titfer, always had a nice silk handkerchief in his top pocket. A very dapper man. He would call whoever was serving at the time and told them it was “drinks on the house”. I enjoyed that treat quite a few times.
The thing I remember most about that little pub was Jim’s tales, time has eroded the memory of a lot of them so I’d like to share with you the few that I do recall.
The Thames sailing barges were hard working boats that plied up and down the east side ,going as far as Norfolk and to parts of the Channel. They always sailed close inshore and were worked by a skipper ,a mate and, sometimes , a third hand. Mostly a boy.
Jim said that he was carrying an assorted cargo from the Medway up to the Pool and was asked by the agent if he would take two ladies who going to work in a Christian mission in the Polar area . Jim only had a boy with him on this trip, boy with the foulest mouth in Christendom. His every other word was fack, he could even do split infinitves like “ O fackin K!” Jim was worried about Gingers language upsetting the good ladies and so he spent the hours preceding their boarding teaching him the proper words to use in front of the ladie. Ginger had to show them where they could spend their time as they went up to the Pool. He was to start off by showing them the messroom and then show them what they had in the way of toilet facilities. Jim stressed that the proper word for peeing was “Urinate” and the proper word for a number two was evacuate. Delivering a stern warning about using any foul language , Jim left the welcoming to Ginger while he and the mate got “Will Everard” ready for the trip up river. She was’nt a massive craft, nearly everywhere aboard was in earshot and ,when the ladies arrived ,Jim heard Ginger welcome them .”Welcome aboard the Will ladies, I’d like to show yer where yer kin park yerselves as we go up upriver” Ginger took their bags and took them to the mess “ Thi ‘ere’s called the mess ,yer kin kip ‘ere if yiz need 40 winks” He put their bags down there and led them to the stern. Pointing to the galvanised bucket with a half inch rope attached ,he said “ Now if yers need a tinkle, yer kin uranimate in the bucket , but ,if yers need to evacurate ,ye’ll a’ve to sh** over the side like the rest of us”
Jim said he near ruptured himself trying not to laugh out loud.
The bargemen carried lots of unusual cargoe’s, those of you who read Dickens “Our Mutual Friend “ will know that there was great trade in human excreta. Dried out in the sewage works of the Thameside towns ,this was carried to some place down river where it was stored and sold to farmers for spreading on their fields. This trade was still in existence when Jim was sailing on the Will and told me this sad story, he was just going into Rochester and he was passing another Everards barge making her way out of Rochester. He hailed her “ Where r’yer bound ?” back came the reply “ Upriver” Jim then noticed quite a few people on deck, “ Wot’r yer carryin’” He queried , back came the reply “ A cargo o’ sh** an’ a bunch o’ Shakespearean Hactors!!”
Jim said he met the other barge captain a week or so later and the captain told Jim that as soon as he had called out his cargo ,one of the old Thespians turned to another and said “We’ll make the top of the bill yet old boy “
Another of Jims stories concerned one of the last true barge skippers ,the legendary Bob Roberts of the Cambria,the last working barge on the Thames. I never had the pleasure of meeting Bob , if I had I think he would have been contemptuous of me. He was a true sailor man, no power winches or steam engines for him. Anyway ,Bob was carrying a party of trainees from a sailing club/ school(I forget which) .Bob was scathing about them, they knew it all from books, however, during one such session a lady asked what they would do if the barge sank, Bob replied “Swim for the shore” she answered “but I can’t swim” Bob said “Well ,wait ‘til she touches bottom and then run like hell!”
Sadly ,that world is gone now, most old barges have gone for scrap and the few that are left are owned by clubs or individuals. I feel privileged to have spent a short time on their river and to have had a glimpse of how things used to be. I’ll be back aboard the Allurity soon.

As usual a great yarn Brian and a good experience, I always knew it was only about two in a Barge crew but the bucket is something I never considered I guess they had to go somewhere but they obviousley never considered all those bathers down at South End, in OZ we called those floaters 'Blind Mullet'

I recall a time we were in Surrey Commercial dock and one of the Thames Barges was alongside when some onboard used the bog, it went all over the barge and the barge skipper threatend to come aboard and sort the whole crew out.